One day if we part ways..

One day if we part ways I want you to know that I tried I tried, I tried so damn hard to fight the hate, the anger and the reality that the person I once loved unconditionally stole my happiness without even trying to. I want you to know that I gave up because there…

Unexpected.

I can feel my heart racing. I can feel my knees shaking, wobbling, I almost think they might just give up on my weight. I can barely see clearly. It’s happening I tell myself. It’s…it’s happening. I grab my stuff, my purse, my keys, everything. And then I remembered you. I should have called you,…

The happiest.

I couldn’t believe it was me. The girl staring into the mirror fixing the tikka on my head making sure it was centered. Yah, I couldn’t believe she was me. I had dreamt of this day. I had convinced myself halfway that I didn’t want it. But, it’s here. I can feel my heart beating…

24/12/2018

It was a warm day, it felt like it was going to be a good one too. The sun was out, the breeze was just right, the sky was just the perfect blue, plenty of clouds, just how I like it. I took a deep breath in, then paused and took another really deep one,…

Somewhere in between

In between fear & faith In between the tears & laughs In between discipline & disturbance In between control & weakness In between trust & doubt In between the day & night In between the present & future In between sacrifice & selfishness In between locking eyes & avoiding them In between pushing & pulling…

Peace of mind.

“Hey, I mean hi, I mean hello, what am I supposed to say?” I look down at my shoes, my laces came off. God dammit. “What’s up?” I’m probably the stupidest person in the whole wide world. “How does it feel? You look like a freaking zombie, a good looking zombie.” I can almost feel…

I miss you

Thursday, 22 October 2015 I miss you I miss you. How long has it been? Two years? Three? It’s been a while since I revisited the memories we made There were no words Just gestures Smiles! Tonnes of that! Weren’t there? It’s almost as though you understood everything Eventhough the disease ate at your mind…

Dear the people I love,

Dear, the people I love I wish for you to know that I am not exactly who i seem to be. That the smile on my face is the one I’ve promised to keep drawn. That my defensive nature is one i have acquired, not created for myself. That my laugh is loud because I want it to resonate into my soul. That my restlessness…

Brocolli

Broccoli It was time. I had delayed it already. Once before. I had just 10 minutes to get ready. That’s more than enough for a 35 year old man. Right? Okay, who am I kidding, I’m 40. I haven’t done it in so long. It’s all so new. So different. I wish you were here….

Happiness

Questions. How much does it cost? What does it even look like? How does it feel? What are we talking about?   We are talking about happiness.   I thought I knew. I always thought that it was the one thing I was so sure about and knew everything about. But the truth is, it’s…

Unload

Finally. The walk uphill was so long, so tiring, my feet ache but not as much as my heart does. I take a seat. There is this beautiful patch of flowers. I pick one of them up, and start picking at the petals. ” love me” “love me not” There are two petals left. I…

Us.

It was time. I stared at myself in the mirror, stole a glance at the time and then fixed my hair for the last time. I was wearing a dark green saree, the blouse had gotten a little tighter for me but it was the perfect combination. I slipped into my three inch heels, almost took…